I think you're thinking too much
but only because you want so badly to do everything right.
One thing to keep in mind - we all make mistakes. You'll find at LEAST one thing you wish you did different after you raise this puppy, but you just apply what you learned to the next one. It sounds like you've definitely done enough homework that your learning curve won't "damage' your little girl.
For crating - the goal, I feel, is to have a dog that is comfortable being crated when it's necessary. Make it a common enough event that being in the crate isn't strange, or worrisome (pop her in for a couple minutes when you're cleaning, cooking, like Theresa said) and use it for potty training as needed. I definitely like to use it for overnight potty training because I think the risk of them having accidents is larger when they are out and can move around - unless they are in bed with you and you're a light enough sleeper to wake up if they start moving... but then, the little puppy in bed with you will expect to stay there when she's a 50-60lb adult.
I wouldn't put a limit on cuddle time, but I'd be careful not to cuddle her when she's being bratty or pushy - cuddling is a fun mutual activity, not something that gets demanded or a reward for snotty behavior.
I think puppies benefit from a regular feeding schedule and I would buy her a bowl and feed her meals. You can use some of her kibble to train her, but can still give a portion of it at meal times. You can also set up mealtime rules, which is a less-dramatic version of what that guy is trying to do - set you up as "she who controls the resources". Both my pups have to go to certain spots and sit while I prepare their dinner and have to wait for the OK before diving in. It doesn't take much time, it's just a small exercise in self-control for them twice a day.
